Anyone with a lighter, a kitchen knife, or a little know-how can get a bottle open. The key to doing it with real flash and flourish is to get an opener that’s as unique as you are. It’s not enough to merely rely on your multi-tool for accessing your suds. You’ve got to bring a game that sets you apart from every other guy with a bit of metal on his belt or in his pocket. You require one of the coolest, most unique, most stylish bottle openers around, or you’re just another problem drinker trying to get past the cap as quickly as possible.
Related Reading: Top 10 Bottle Opener Keychains
Bling Ring
You can’t fail with a ring bottle opener, so go ahead and also pimp your hand with a sparkle and pizzazz. You can opt for simpler choices, but everything is better when bedazzled. Purchase: $5
Millennium Falcon Bottle Opener
The accessory that should already grace any Star Wars fan’s collection, if for no other reason than it helps you drink enough to forget Episodes 1 through 3. Purchase: $6
Kikkerland Luchador
Designed by Andres Lhima who brought his passion for Lucha libre to beer drinkers from around the world, the base of this is stainless steel with an ABS and rubber coating that allows it to grip like Latin giant-killer Rey Mysterio and bring the most brutal caps to their grisly end. Purchase: $8
Bottle Wrench
For the DIY gal or guy who wants to remind everyone how handy they are in every situation, this is an actual wrench repurposed to do the job and blend in with your other tools. Purchase: $8
Blackout Hammer Down
Though no bottle opener can be called a complex machine, few are as utterly simple as the Hammer Down. Rather than going through prying or twisting, the intuitive body needs nothing more than a couple of pounds to get the job done. Purchase: $9
Tin Mill Magnetic Bottle Opener
Machined from a single piece of stainless steel, the elegant simplicity of this minimalist tool is revealed when it snags the cap so you’ll never again be stooping over to pick it up like a fool. Purchase: $10
Doctors Orders Prescription Opener
A quaint little piece that lets mommy or daddy get into the only medicine they really need, this is a fun bit of novelty kitsch that never fails to draw a chuckle from your audience. Purchase: $10
Sizzler Beer Saver
The wise choice for the craft sipper or lightweight who doesn’t always want a whole lager in one sitting, the Sizzler begins by getting the cap off, then becomes its own flat-fighting stopper should you need to stop your swilling mid-way through. Purchase: $13
Pop a Cap Bullet Opener
What could be more noticeable or more appropriate than a .50 caliber bullet that’s been turned into an innocuous little cap popper? An honest brass casing makes it nearly indestructible, and gives it a rugged look the more you whip it out. Purchase: $15
Reef Fanning Speed Logo Sandal
For those days when you take a cooler out on the deck to kick back, or those summer cookouts along the shore, these are the last sandals you’ll ever need. Purchase: $29+
Kebo One Handed Bottle Opener
Work on improving that limp grip while you get a buzz. The moment this comes out, everyone will want to give it a whirl to prove their hand strength and lush-ness. Purchase: $16
Nickel Plated Personalized Bottle Opener
The chromed shine of nickel has never made opening a beer look better. If you insist on going with an engraved choice, this is showy and classy, worthy of being given the personal touch. Purchase: $19
Bottle Opening Pint Glass
There’s a lot to love about any opener that does double duty. Here you can have your frosty glass at hand and never be hunting for a way to get at the sweet nectar to fill it. Pick it up, pop the top, and pour, all in one easy action. Purchase: $25
Ripper Knuckle Opener
Knuckle dusters are technically illegal in many areas, but there’s no law against wanting to open a bottle. As good for quick self-defense as beating the hell out of a cap, the Ripper is great for swigging and swinging in equal measure. Purchase: $23
Bottle Grenade
All aluminum and bearing a quadruple array of hex wrenches for doing real repairs, the Bottle Grenade also opens pry and twist-off caps so you can avoid cutting your hand on those PBR bottles. Purchase: $25
Bombshell Barmaid Beer Opening Coasters
Rather than having a single bottle opener being passed around among guests, arm them each with their own coaster that doubles as a way to uncap any craft brew. The dual function will also entice them to keep the coaster handy, which can save your furniture from bottle sweat. Purchase: $30
Chromoly Road Popper
You can get a DUI or DWI on a bike, but so long as you don’t overdo it, the Road Popper turns any steed into a mini bar for a little imbibing after your pedaling session. Purchase: $35
Brew Clip
A minimalist metal wallet that hides a quick clip for taking off tops, you can stash 5 credit cards and a multitude of bills in this should you so choose. The one problem is convincing everyone you forgot your wallet at home when it’s time to pay the tab.
Machine Era KeySquare
A solid block of hardcore stainless that can slip onto and off of your belt or into your pocket with a quickness, you’ll never be without your keys, and always prepared for a pint at home or away. Purchase: $42
Skull Bottle Opener
Skulls went out of vogue with Marilyn Manson, unless it’s hand-cast by Jac Zagoory Designs. Then it transforms into a work of functional art that’s playfully, grinningly macabre.
Grovemade Brass Key Ring
A lifetime purchase that starts out gorgeous and then comes to bear its own unique patina with time, here you’re preparing for keeping your keys close with supreme panache. Purchase: $59
Ansoknives Carabiner V.3
Milled from .200″ thick titanium to provide operation as a carabiner and keychain, in addition to its life as a bottle opener, the only real decision here is what color best suits your sense of style.
Discommon Bottle Opener
Understated and able to blend into the most sophisticated decor, this artful piece is aerospace aluminum that has been hand-finished for quality that you have to feel to truly appreciate. Purchase: $140
William Painter Hook
Outdoor barbecues and tailgate parties require protecting your eyes from the sun, but also call for the capacity to cool down with whatever booze is available. Here you have a beautiful melding of quality sunglasses that guard your peepers, and keep the demon of sobriety at bay. Purchase: $165
