TheCoolist is a mood board for your headspace.

    THECOOLIST
  1. TheCoolist
  2. Humor

48 Dirty Knock-Knock Jokes (Shameless, Raunchy, and Always Juvenile)

Dirty knock-knock jokes break the mold of the traditional knock-knock joke and deliver an unexpected punch for which few are ever prepared. Dirty knock-knock jokes differ from conventional juvenile knock-knock jokes because these raunchy quips are anything but juvenile. Instead, naughty knock-knock jokes deliver a style of humor that bounces between offensive, rude, and vulgar, with a brash and unapologetic stance that allows them to reverberate and linger in any room.

Best Dirty Knock Knock Jokes
Dirty knock-knock jokes are an adult-oriented take on the classic knock-knock joke

Playing with racy knock-knock jokes makes you quickly realize that there are many avenues that open. Sleek and sexy knock-knock jokes maintain the element of fun and sprinkle in a touch of naughtiness without being too heavy or vulgar. Likewise, flirty knock-knock jokes reside on the lighter end of the dirty humor spectrum with a degree of rudeness that is unmistakably adult but more low-key in its delivery.

Comedy plays an important role in many people’s lives. Between couples, the ability to laugh and joke with each other amidst the pressure of the daily grind is a vital tool in building healthy relationships. Having a few dirty knock-knock jokes for your boyfriend is just the ticket when you’re missing each other, but it’s not yet time for your Wednesday night quickie. Likewise, sending a few dirty knock-knock jokes to your girlfriend when she’s missing you makes all the difference in keeping the spice alive in your relationship.

You are unlikely to see much success in using knock-knock jokes as dirty pick up lines. However, you could certainly score some points by sprinkling a few inappropriate knock-knock jokes into the conversation. However, a good rule of thumb for any sort of dirty knock-knock jokes is that for the best results, wait until everybody is sufficiently lubricated.

10 truly dirty knock-knock jokes for adults

Dirty knock-knock jokes for adults are that special kind of jokes that have no right to exist, but at the same time, we are all happier because they do. Much like Rule 34 for the internet, a similar logic exists for comedy, including knock-knock jokes. Dirty knock-knock jokes exist because the unwritten rules state that any type of joke needs to have some dirty offerings. The great thing about dirty knock-knock jokes for adults is that you have very few restrictions. Combined with the normal silliness of knock-knock humor, this boundlessness provides a wealth of comedy potential.

Below are 10 truly dirty knock-knock jokes for adults to put a smirk on your face.

1. Knock knock,
Who’s there?
Gordon,
Gordon who?
Gordon rams me better than you ever did.


2. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Jamaican.
Jamaican who?
Jamaican me horny.


3. Knock, Knock
Who’s there?
Ivana.
Ivana who?
Ivana cum inside you tonight!


4. Knock, Knock!
Who’s There?
Anita!
Anita who?
Anita cock inside me!


5. Knock, knock
Who’s there?
Mayan Ipples.
Mayan Ipples who?
Mayan Ipples are so hard right now.


6. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Khan.
Khan who?
Khan-dom broke. I hope you’re on the pill!


7. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Juicy.
Juicy who?
Juicy the size of that woman’s tits?


8. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Ben Dover.
Ben Dover who?
Ben Dover and I’ll give you a big surprise!


9. Knock knock,
Who’s there?
Salt.
Salt who?
Salt T. Nuts


10. Knock knock,
Who’s there?
Taj.
Taj who?
Taj Maddick, will ya? It’s been ages!

5 sleek and sexy knock-knock jokes

Sexy knock-knock jokes are a step apart from the usual knock-knock fare. Dirty knock-knock jokes have the room to be vulgar (even to the extreme), but sexy knock-knock jokes retain a strong measure of the silly but with heavy sensual overtones. Sexy knock-knock jokes have a gentle, yet playful, quality to them and show the deftness of linguistic touch that often makes all the difference.

Below are 5 sleek and sexy knock-knock jokes for the confident comic with a brave heart.

11. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
[Sexy voice:] Whoever you would like it to be?


12. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Not your wife.


13. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Ice cream.
Ice cream who?
Ice cream for you all night long so open the door.


14. Knock, knock,
Who’s there?
Ike Anne.
Ike Anne who?
Ike Anne make you scream, baby!


15. Knock knock,
Who’s there?
Dill.
Dill who?
Dill Dough but I’d rather have a good dicking.

6 Fun but flirty knock-knock jokes with dirty intentions

Flirty knock-knock jokes have dirty intentions; they hide them behind a degree of wanton silliness that catches you off guard and open to their punchlines. However, it’s important to remember that flirty knock-knock jokes are not your usual level of flirting; you should only attempt them if you’re truly unafraid to fail.  

Below are 6 fun and flirty knock-knock jokes with dirty intentions that cannot be hidden.

16. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Ivan.
Ivan who?
Ivan to do something naughty with you.


17. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Dozer.
Dozer who?
Dozer the biggest breasts I’ve ever seen.


18. Knock, knock,
Who’s there?
Ida.
Ida who?
Ida rather be naked with you right now.


19. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Ben.
Ben who?
Ben down and worship my booty!


20. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Al.
Al who?
Al let you touch my tits if you open this door.


21. Knock knock,
Who’s there?
Justin.
Justin who?
Justin time for something naughty.

5 cheeky knock-knock jokes as dirty pick-up lines

Using knock-knock jokes as dirty pick-up lines is not for the fainthearted. Rarely does anybody succumb to the pick-up prowess of a dirty knock-knock joke. However, fortune favors the brave and those willing to take a risk and use a few knock-knock jokes as dirty pick up lines. A good sense of humor counts for a lot when people look for potential relationship matches, so turning knock-knock jokes into dirty pick up lines is always worth a shot.

Below are 5 cheesy ways to use knock-knock jokes as dirty pick up lines.

22. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Baby owl.
Baby owl who?
Baby owl see you later at my place.


23. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Bee.
Bee who?
Bee-hind you is where I’d love to stand. 


24. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Amanda.
Amanda who?
Amanda squeeze and hug all night is what I want.


25. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Someone.
Someone who?
Someone who will get you laid.


26. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
When where.
When where who?
Tonight, my place, you and me.

4 awesome dirty knock-knock jokes for your boyfriend

Keeping a few dirty knock-knock jokes for your boyfriend to one side is a great way to keep the fun alive when you’re dating. A naughty joke is a great way to connect and keep romance alive, even while juggling household, work, and family commitments. Never underestimate the power of dirty knock-knock jokes to turn someone’s day around and put a big smile on their face.

Below are 4 awesome dirty knock-knock jokes just for your boyfriend and the times he needs them the most.

27. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Bacon.
Bacon who?
Bae, can you give me a kiss?


28. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Helda dick.
Helda dick who?
Helda dick last night but it wasn’t as good as yours!


29. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Mike.
Mike who?
Mike Hunt is hungry for your dick!


30. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Can I come in?
Can I come in who?
OK but just this once.

4 equally dirty knock-knock jokes for your girlfriend

Adding a few dirty knock-knock jokes for your girlfriend into your comedy repertoire is invaluable. Naughty humor, including the randomness of dirty knock-knock jokes, show your girlfriend you are thinking about her and how much she means to you. Having a few special dirty knock-knock jokes for your girlfriend to fall back on helps keep you close even when life seems to keep getting in the way. Besides, the couple that laughs together stays together.

Below are four fantastic dirty knock-knock jokes to tell your girlfriend.

31. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Waiter.
Waiter who?
Waiter I get my hands on your booty.


32. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Dewey!
Dewey who?
Dewey have to use a condom tonight?


33. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Baghdad.
Baghdad who?
Baghdad butt up on my cock.


34. Knock knock,
Who’s there?
Tess.
Tess who?
Tess Tickles.

4 hilariously inappropriate knock-knock jokes

Inappropriate knock-knock jokes are a strange kettle of fish, as knock-knock jokes are mostly a childish comedy style that plays on randomness rather than obscenity. Inappropriate knock-knock jokes should only be told under very strict conditions, as they are unapologetically dirty in their delivery and punchline insinuations. Dirty humor is a popular style with a modern audience, and as such, it’s never a bad idea to commit a few inappropriate knock-knock jokes to memory just so that you have them on hand in case of an emergency.

Below are 4 hilariously inappropriate knock-knock jokes that have the uncanny ability to turn any conversation instantly awkward.

35. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Idaho.
Idaho who?
No! You da ho, I’m da Johnny!


36. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Ivanna Seymour.
Ivanna Seymour who?
Ivanna Seymour butts.


37. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Do you want two CDs?
Do you want two CDs who
Do you want to CDs nuts?


38. Knock knock,
Who’s there?
Bo.
Bo who?
Bo Nerr.

5 unapologetically rude knock-knock jokes

Rude knock-knock jokes defy the common structure of the knock-knock joke with their unapologetic vulgarity, raunchiness, and shock value. Traditional knock-knock jokes are a predominantly juvenile type of humor, which relies on puns and mild innuendo. However, rudeness is a spectrum that is driven by a conceptual mix of shock and crudeness. The results of injecting knock-knock jokes with rudeness vary greatly depending on the skill of the teller and the mindset of the audience.

Below are 5 shamelessly rude knock-knock jokes guaranteed to make a few people blush.

39. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Anita Colo.
Anita Colo who?
Anita blow job, are you game?


40. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Gladiator.
Gladiator who?
Gladiator during that threesome.


41. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Phil.
Phil who?
Phil McCrackin would ya, I’m horny.


42. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Buster.
Buster who?
Buster Cherry!
Is your daughter home?


43. Knock knock,
Who’s there?
The mechanic.
The mechanic who?
The mechanic who heard you wanted a rim job.

5 naughty knock-knock jokes for when the room turns blue

Naughty knock-knock jokes are the kind of jokes that come out after a few beers in the company of good friends. Every comic understands the importance of timing, and naughty knock-knock jokes are a prime example of knowing your audience and being able to read a room. Only the most foolhardy will break out crude or naughty knock-knock jokes in a room full of strangers. However, when the time is right, nothing gets a few boozed-up chuckles better than some naughty knock-knock jokes.

Below are 5 examples of naughty knock-knock jokes that leave little to the imagination.

44. Knock Knock.
Who’s There?
Hop on.
Hop on who?
Hop on dis dick.


45. Knock Knock.
Who’s there?
A yam.
A yam who?
A-yam so wet for you right now.


46. Knock knock,
Who’s there?
Mike.
Mike who?
Mike Oxlong think you can handle it?


47. Knock knock,
Who’s there?
Heywood.
Heywood who?
Heywood Jablome.


48. Knock knock,
Who’s there?
Anita.
Anita who?
Anita P. Ness.